Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Growing up too soon

My 7th grade daughter came home from school on the 3rd day with some very disturbing information. Someone her and her best friend talk with at school is doing some crazy things with her boyfriend in his home in the evening. I won't go into details as I'm sure you all can use your imagination. I have heard this girls name before but have never met her. I don't know the circumstances of her life, her living situation, or if her family is even home to keep tabs on her.

As my daughter gets older I am starting to believe the saying "it takes a village to raise a child." I can't help but think if it was my girl doing these things, someone better tell me before it's too late. But, I don't even know these people so what am I supposed to do?

She also tells me about a goth chic that she sits next to in one of her classes. She cuts herself. She says it's how she controls her anger. My daughter, Dallas for those of you who don't know her name, told this girl she was praying for her. The girl confided in Dallas and said she does believe in God but can't stop cutting herself.

Who knew they would have to grow up at such a young age?

Dallas and her best friend have decided not to be friends with the girl who's doing crazy things with her boyfriend. Thank you God, what a grown up decision they've made.

I have told Dallas I don't want her hanging out with the goth chic who is cutting herself but to keep letting her know that she is praying for her.

I am scared because I know there is a very fine line here. A line between doing what is right and going down a path that is hard to return from.

I am scared because there isn't much I can do to stop the world from crashing in on her.

I'm scared because I've buried my head in the sand long enough.

These kids are dealing with things we never dreamed of at this age.

I think of you Dallas, every time I hear this song. I am so proud of you. And Dallas, I love you very much and I am so thankful that you talk with me. I am always here and I will never stop praying for you!
--Love, Mom


LAURIE said...

It is a world today that we as parents better not dare NOT bathe our children in prayer! Taking a stand in school ...what a brave young girl. I am proud of her also. I have a 8th grade girl and I know that she is bombarded with all kinds of things also ... we cannot protect them from it but we can safeguard their minds by planting Gods Word .... thanks for the reminder Cheri! -Blessings, Laurie

Amy said...

Hi, I clicked over from Kimberly's blog. It is scary what are kids are dealing with these days. I have a 7th grade boy and I pray that God will guide him and keep him safe. It is wonderful when we see our children make a good decisions about what to do. I'll be praying for you. Blessings.

ocean mommy said...

Wow. It is almost unbelievable what our children are facing each day. If ever there was a time for parents to make their presence known, it's now!!

I'm so proud of Dallas for being the hands and feet of Jesus to the goth chic, that is just awesome!

What an awesome mom you are Cheri!

Have a great weekend,

Amy Wyatt said...

I'll be praying for your family... especially for Dallas. So glad she is confiding in you!

Carol said...

I can not believe what goes on in seventh grade. Who knew? I will pray for you and Dallas. I am not looking forward to that age. It's wonderful that you've established such a trusting relationship with Dallas that she shares these things with you. You've done a great job with her! ~Carol

Kimberly said...

Hey, Cheri!
Wow. I hardly even know what to say! It is so hard to believe the things that children as young as 7th grade face and are exposed to. I know that has to be frightening as a mom! I am not looking forward to those days myself.

And yet, how awesome that you do have such open communication with your daughter. And how wonderful that she knows that prayer is needed. She is being salt and light in her school!

I have to pray that God will help me trust Him that He is big enough to protect my babies...even in the darkness that is out there in schools!

Praying for you and your precious daughter!

Laura said...

Those are tough years...I remember. Keep praying for/talking to your daughter. It makes all the difference in the world! Great post!!

LAURIE said...

Thanks for stopping by my TT post today. Hope you are doing well - been thinking about you. I miss your postings. -Blessings, Laurie

Jenifer said...

Hey my sista. How in the world are you? Hope things are going well for you.

Let Dallas know I praying for her to have strength, wisdom, and courage to do all and be all that God has called her to be and do. Also know that you are in my prayers as you continue to seek the Lord's guidance in how to be a godly mother to her.

Blessings to you my friend,

Christina said...

Beautiful song and even more beautiful that it reminds you of Dallas. Dallas is making a very good choice, but like you it seems that kids have to deal with all kinds of things at such a young age, like who to hang around with, and what some of the girls are doing that they shouldn't be. All we can do is pray and reach out to each other in prayer like your Dallas is doing for this girl.

Bridget said...

Coming from someone who has has experience with people with mental problems, cutting yourself is a serious symptom of needing help, but it is not contagious. Your daughter wont be tempted to do it just because she is around the other girl. That girl was probably reaching out to Dallas hoping that maybe she could get some help. Maybe both you and Dallas can go to the guidance counselor or teacher (who is obligated to get outside help) and mention that girl. Dallas could be the tool God uses to save that child.

Kimberly said...

Hey, girl! Just checking in! I figured even though I have already commented on this post, I could still say "Hey" real quick. So.....
HEY! :)

I hope you are having a great weekend!

Love ya',
K :)

harley lynn said...

i have been cutting myself since last school year started. i am only thirteen and i hate looking at the scars on my pale skin that the cuts leave. it was so hard to tell someone that i was doing it and when i finally told one of my seventh grade teachers she told me that she wouldn't call my mom as long as i promised to stop. i promised i would but my best friend told her that i hadn't stopped and she called my mom. i am still cutting now but in less obvious places like my hips the top of my legs so no one else knows that i am doing it. people probably think im crazy but cutting really does make me feel better. i am there for anyone who needs to talk. you can email me at i really hate my parents because they are really abusive to me and i guess i am sometimes jealous of my friends who are all so close to their parents when i never have anyone to tell anything personal to, it really sucks, anyway good post!!!!!!!!!

Jenifer said...

Just a shout out to ya! Hope you are well. Miss ya!

Blessings from above,

Ceci said...

Oh, girl...I can so empathize and sympathize with you as my own "little" girl is off to the 7th grade this year. She also is aware of girls who are doing things she would NOT dare do with a boy, friends who have chosen to be "goth/emo". In fact, my daughter seems to draw these girls to herself. I believe it is the love of our family and Christ within my daughter that attracts them and I pray for her protection and for the strength to do what is right. In fact, this last weekend we "fought" for what was right in the face of peer pressure--not at the hands of a classmate, but a classmate's parent who was encouraging her to become goth because it was "cool." Thank God that He gave me wisdom to deal with the situation. It is my prayer to show love to the mother because at my house, we know THAT is COOL.

Amy Wyatt said...

Missing you Hope you are all well.